just got beat up by a bunch of monks no not the ones that are cool and fight eachother it was the boring ones yeah i said that to them thats why they beat me up
they tonsured your ass didn’t they
Yeah and my head too unfortunately
(via zevsurana)
i have an iron grip on my couch watching these vampire girls in van helsing (2004)
i’d give so much of it up
i’ve never been as high as i was last night and got so horny from these women that i had to stop watching it
(via leftboob-enthusiast)
you see whenever i dont understand someone’s sexuality or gender or pronouns or whatever i go “ohwell this has nothing to do w me!” and move on w my day
(via girlfoxcock)
fuck “passing”, i want people to be so confused about my gender they blow up
(via leftboob-enthusiast)
forget about touching grass, i need to touch THE SEA I NEED TO GO INTO THE WATER I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!!!!!!!!!!!
I NEED TO GO IN THERE ⬇️⬇️⬇️‼️‼️‼️
(via lotshusband)
inaccurate, they will survive.
can someone please make it so the cats spit the fireball back and forth
(via fartgallery)
grocery store mission barely accomplished took massive damage to the hull and all internal systems. shield repair could take days
(via egberts)
i love saying “get off my dick” even though i don’t have one
i don’t have a dick but you’re still determined to ride it
(via egberts)
motivational poster i made in case anyone else needs it
(via redbuddi)